John van der Put is a lovely man and a very gifted blogger and I feel honoured to be his friend, I read his latest post and felt profoundly moved by it and feel it should be shared with a wider audience. So here it is, love to you John.
I put your name on the door
Though I knew you weren't coming
I stood before strangers
And I prayed you weren't comingI
talked and they laughed
Because they knew you weren't coming
I knelt and I begged
But I knew you weren't coming
Things I wanted to say but didn't fit into the poem which doesn't really say what I wanted it to: I did the whole show to an empty door waiting for you to come in. I have no hope but grace, it's all I hold on to, it's all I can face. I ate dinner and couldn't taste it. I miss you like nothing else.