Friday, 14 May 2010

Robert Mugabe Has a New Best Friend!

As the two mentalists meet, allies in being utterly wacky and killing people who dissent, a firm handshake is shared, a handshake seemingly supervised by a Jew. Mahmoud Ahmadinejad hides his loathing of the Jew well behind a rictus smile. Mugabe grins inanely, not being too sure what a Jew is.

With the Jew still loitering in the background, soon to be shot, Mugabe and Ahmadinejad double up on the handshake, making it a virtual hand sandwich. However, smiles quickly fade as the clamminess of the anti-Semite's skin upsets the mad old African ballbag, who keeps his "claws of death" (as he named them) in tip-top shape. The alliance of lunacy is in the balance...

Embarrassed by his clammy palms and realising the bat-shit crazy old loon is literally slipping from his grasp, Ahmadinejad throws caution to the wind and moves in for the reach around and embraces the mentally unbalanced honky-hater. Smiles all round as Mugabe loves this kind of man on man shit and anyway, the Arab makes him feel tall.

A quick change of suits after the successful (if slightly wet) handshake and full on cuddle, leaves the two dictators in a confident and sartorially smooth mood, so much so, that the two unlikely gays hold hands and prance about an airport where Mugabe has all the whites shipped out of the country and blames everything on the British.


  1. Hey Daniel.
    I'm not sure if you are aware or not but on the channel More 4 this tuesday at 9 (I think it is) there is a documentary on about white farmers in South Africa and how they are treated. Seems like propour gritty stuff. Apparently this particular documentry is BAFTA winning. Meant to be brilliant and shcoking. Well worth a watch by the sounds of things. I will be tuning in!

  2. Cheers Jessica, if I'm back from filming in time I will deffo check it out, sounds just up my street.

  3. Brilliant! Ahmadinejad and Mugabe doing the Dictator Cuddle is just what the world needs.

  4. Indeed Kat, the bringing together of two fools in dictatorship harmony...

  5. Small point, except to those being incorrectly identified, but Persians are not Arabs. You seem to know a lot, how did you miss that bit?

    - Stephen

  6. Stephen, are you out of your mind mate? This piece is a piss take, as far as the feral Mugabe cares, all Persians are Arabs and all Arabs Persians.

    This is a piss-take you mentalist!


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