Saturday, 22 April 2006

My New Arab Scarf

In preparation for The Big Adventure I decided to invest in a versatile but attractive scarf and I was browsing my local Army surplus when I decided to plump for a Keffiyeh; very much like the one sported by the gentlemen above.

For those of you that don't know, the Keffiyeh (كوفية) is a traditional Arab headdress but one I'll mostly be sporting as a device to keep my neck warm and little did I realise that it is a heavily politicised garment. Don't get me wrong, I'm not naive enough to assume that it doesn't carry certain connotations but when browsing the selection in the Army Surplus store I wished I'd known that the garment has just had something of a revival as an icon of the Palestinian struggle against Zionist oppression.

For example, the black-and-white one is associated with the PLO and Fateh, while the Green one is associated with Islamism, (and also with Islamic Jihad) while the colour I opted for, Red, is often associated with socialism (that I can handle) and also the colour often worn by civilian supporters of Hamas.

It has already drawn some interesting responses, whether it be from some Jewish pupils I teach (which in turn led to a fruitful discussion on Middle Eastern politics), or at the airport on the way to Brussels where it was presumed by staff that I was waiting for a flight to Lebanon, or an elderly chap who asked me whose side I was on in the current Gulf War, or some youths who shouted racist abuse at me (it was a bizarre feeling to be called a "Paki") and another set of England's future who thought it meant I was a Muslim and proceeded to make jokes about Allah.

This got me thinking about what if I actually was Arabian and actually was a Muslim and what kind of abuse I'd get?

Like I said some time ago: We Got Ourselves a New Nigger.


  1. Daniel, sometimes you exhaust me.

    Educational post nonetheless.

  2. I suppose it should be encouraging that you were called racist names, even though you are obviously caucasian.

    I didn't know about the different colours of Keffiyeh having meaning, other than Arafat's signature black and white. All political cartoons drew him wearing it and usually it was with a barbed wire pattern.

    This is as nutty as the colours of shoelaces in high schools meaning differet things; in some places it's associated with gang membership, in others it's more to do with dating and sexuality.

    Your experience reminded me of a 1970 movie "Watermelon Man". What you might call "black" comedy even though that phrase is a pun in this case. Bigoted white guy wakes up black. They've shown his life routines to set it up first. So he goes for his morning jog in his suburban neighbourhood. Of course he gets arrested, since he is a black man running down the street, he must have done something bad. His boss is somewhat cool, now he can sell insurance to those blacks. The neighbours later come to his workplace to buy his house for 4 times its price and save their property values (he would be seen as a "blockbuster"). Many other examples of the same guy facing racism, especially from the same people who accepted him when he was a white.

  3. I suppose it should be encouraging that you were called racist names, even though you are obviously caucasian.

    What kind of fucking retard finds encouragement in either racism, or your "obvious" white-assed-ness?

    But enough about people who quote Watermelon Man and don't seem to have known about Black Like Me, which was anything but funny, and how these interesting responses you garnered are dramatic gold, and if you're talking about responsive theatre, you literally walked into an entire running series of plays about being mistaken.

    Just don't kill it by doing a whole Spying On Myself treatment with it, that's just bad.

    For the record, Hamas was duly elected, and the sonsofbitches who cut off emergency funding, my nation's asshead Conservative government included, are in violation of human rights, and should be sued into ponying up.

  4. This is as nutty as the colours of shoelaces in high schools meaning differet things; in some places it's associated with gang membership, in others it's more to do with dating and sexuality.

    I mean, honestly, I don't want to embarrass "bud" more than he does himself, but seriously, how isolated from humanity is this person? Have they never heard of sociological badging?

    Obviously, despite the patriotic rhetoric, the bud was never a military man, otherwise the "nuttiness" of sectarian identification would have been kicked out of his ass by a pair of size 12 boots years and years ago.

    Jesus Christ, there really is no greater evil than a man who refuses to know himself. And I thought philosophy was a soft job.

  5. Sorry for hogging the comments, but the Paki thing explained is thusly:

    At the partition of India after World War II, the following Muslim groups were mishmashed to create a new Islamic nation ("Stan"):


    The new nation was thus named PAKI-stan. Ten minutes later a war broke out over ownership of Kashmir.

  6. Lovely post and a call for all to check the stand and whta they think they know.
    Too bad you had to undergo the racist thing in the current 21st century and for sure we will nevre do away with it if we can mistake somebody because of his dressing.
    Cant we accomodate our brothers and sisters?

  7. Bud: I have no idea why it's encouraging, I see it as an example of the harresment Arab people are on the receiving end of.

    Also, I don't class it as nutty regarding colours symbolising something, that's just life.

    Col.Dr: Paki is an insult in the UK, a very offensice one, it is the Asian equiv of nigger.

  8. Intolerance should never be encouraging, and should always be fought hard and with feeling!

  9. Daniel: without the series of flames after my comment, you might have caught the irony.

    If you talk to young people, they are much more "colour blind" than previous generations. A kid describing another kid might describe their clothes, body size, or hair, and will not think to mention the other kid is asian, black or whatever. I was alluding to that colour blindness, even when found in this situation. They reacted to the Keffiyeh, completely ignoring that you are white, at least based on your posted puctures, you "look" white. That was unimportant. It was the Keffiyeh. So they were equal opportunity bigots.

    In the same vein, I find it "encouraging" that the Col.Dr. did not counsel me to commit suicide, nor did he threaten me with death at the hands of the future government after the revolution. He even refrained from calling me a nazi. He still does his usual device of putting words in other people's mouth, and taking things out of context, so that he can better churn out his own rhetoric. He refers to my "patriotic rhetoric", perhaps his reading of my comment sees it, but I do not. And as usual he belittles because I did not mention whatever he thinks I should mention. "Black like me" was about a man deliberately trying to pass for black and seeing discrimination first hand. At least that's how my copy of the book presented it. The Watermelon Man reference was more appropriate, mainly because the guy in the story did not intend to explore racism, and it was funny, along with its serious side.

    I saw the humorous side of your experience. Humour is one of the enemies of racism. As an example, years ago, Dick Gregory was doing a performance, and from the audience comes the standard racist name for blacks. The place fell silent. His response? "Some cat just called me Roy Roger's horse, Trigger!". Audience laughed and he moved on. Another example, he enters a restaurant and orders a whole fried chicken. Rednecks approach and say "anything you do to that chicken, we're going to do to you". So the food arrives, he picked up that chicken, and kissed it.

    The nutty forms of "sociological badging" and "sectarian identification" are like the fried chicken episode. The rednecks actually had to tell Gregory that some innocuous activity, like eating his lunch, was to be treated as something much greater, and cause for retaliation. What is nutty about this is that you can wear the badge without even knowing about it.

    As you said, you did not know about the political meanings of the colours of Keffiyeh. Should I call you a bigot and culturally insensitive? No. (Mainly because I didn't know either). I was talking with a teenage relative who had just bought shoes and was busy relacing them. She was describing the different colours and their meanings. At that time the style of lacing was not an issue. She liked to wear mixtures of different parts of "badging" clothing, just to mess with her high school classmates. Some days she was a preppie, others a rocker, others even gothic, but usually a bit of everything. She didn't want to have to relace her shoes for all these different looks, and was trying to remember if there was any colour not covered by the rules at her school. Totally different problem happens visiting friends in other cities, since the rules are different. So I suggested multicoloured laces. She thought that was a good idea, then a few weeks later tells me that means you're gay.

    Do you see the point? Obscure rules made up for "sociological badging" which outsiders do not know. In some schools, they ban gang colours, so they find some other nuance of clothing to use for identification. Next thing you know, kids are sent home because they cut one side of their hair slightly shorter than the other and someone decides that's a gang symbol.

    Did you come up with a snappy comeback to being called a Pakistani? Maybe act like you are, smile and wave, and act like it's one of your Pakistani friends teasing you. Allah jokes? Tell one of the numerous "priest, rabbi and mullah" jokes, you know, not the mean spirited ones, the ones that make all three look a little silly.

    Don't reward racism directed towards you by acting offended. You can see examples of what I mean right in this blog. Do I lower myself to the Col.Dr.'s level with his kind of namecalling and pejoratives? I let much of it blow by, like a smelly fart. I treat it as not deliberate but only the product of whatever he had for lunch today, and only respond to actual content, whenever there is some.

  10. I saw the humorous side of your experience. Humour is one of the enemies of racism.

    Yeah, I can still hear eight generations of slaves laughing in their graves.

    Bud, you are officially a fuckwit.

  11. Just so you know what a fuckwit is, it means someone has penetrated your ability to reason as a human being with some sort of phallic ideology, which in your case is plain old Americorp ignorance.


  12. And I love your complete ignorance about sociological badging, and your racist attempt to equate the Palestinian problem with the Americorp high school gang phenomenon.

    Real bright, fuckwit.

  13. And I'm also noting the fact that a Brazillian got shot for running to catch his train last year, which makes being so mistaken potentially dangerous, so the flippant, coddled attitude of this fuckwit is just a pain in the ass.

    But what can one expect from an Americorp fuckwit who's never seen suffering, and only pays so it can happen to women and children in a country thousands of miles away?

  14. Funny how I describe the Col.Dr.'s techniques and he just keeps on with them in his very next comment. Comments taken out of context again. Putting words in my mouth again, saying that I equate "the Palestinian problem" with high school gangs. You insult and trivialize the "eight generations of slaves" to try and score a debating point. Do you think Dick Gregory should have pulled a gun and shot the catcallers? That would really show them.

    Try something original. Eat better food so you aren't stinking up this place.

  15. Funny how bud forgets that he said your experiences with automatic racism based on the purchase of a scarf was humourous, that he found relief in it, that you should be encouraged by it, and that the universal practice of identifying your particular community using, among other things, the colour of one's clothing is loudly declaimed as "nutty" just because bud, in his obviously complete isolation from the human world has never heard of the term "badging."

    Now that he's side-stepped each challenge to his nonexistent credibility, and continued to make fuckwit statements which are typically Americorp in their trampling of the basic dignity of his nation's voluminous victims, I declare him to descend to the even lower designation of permanent fucktard, with racist certification.

    This will save giving him too much the idea that he, in his pathetically underequipped state, is worthy of much more than fatigued disregard, and make forever clear that he is certainly not important enough to demand a ritual suicide.

    Besides, as an officially designated Americorp fucktard, he'd just get it wrong, and blame everyone around him for being so absent of the merest clue.

    I win, God save the Queen.

  16. Dr. Col. has never won an argument, but let's all give him a hand for trying. And Col. I hope God saves you too.

  17. Interesting. Another coward "Christian" who hides behind anonymous tags and insidious sarcasm. Typical of the cheese-headed phenomenon I've been complaining about.

    This "Christian" attitude is the exact reason people fly planes into buildings, and whatever fucktard sniped that last one in there, you should know you are responsible for Al Qaeda.

    Just another asshead coward without the balls, or content of argument, to make any gesture other than insipid sneering. As we say, you are pwned.

    Fuck, I'm noble.

  18. I don't see anything 'bud' has says as 'trampling of the basic dignity of his nation's voluminous victims.' And I'll be the first one to point out that we all need guilt on our consciences for what our corporate world has done. But of course humour is one of the best defenses against racism - on a personal, human level, which is what I think bud was saying. I don't believe that he was ever trying to solve the Palestinian problem via comedy but then again, I don't see col.dr proposing any solutions either. It all just seems the kind of knee-jerk reactionary posturing that makes it hard for activists to maintain credibility. How absolutely rubbish to accuse someone of being coddled and having never seen suffering... on a blog! How do any of us know any of us have seen suffering?

    But back to the actual subject of the post, yes. Racism is a bad thing, Islamophobia is an incredibly worrying phenomenon. I don't think it's encouraging either that you were called 'paki' for wearing the scarf DHG, but I don't really see how it's anything more than ignorance - sure it's a part of larger attitudes passed down to children... but... well, I don't know, speaking as someone who grew up with racist slurs thrown at me, it's water off a duck's back after awhile and I've grown to see that most of the time, when it's kids, they don't really mean it - they don't have the understanding yet. Why not make some kind of joke out of it, so they'd understand how ridiculous it all was... I do think that begins to diffuse it.

    Col.dr, didn't I read you were Canadian somewhere? So am I. Remember Komagata Maru? Head tax? Residential schools? 'Americorp' is a problem, but it's not the only problem.

  19. Oh, one more thing, DHG - maybe it was because you are white that you were called racist slurs... for the fact that they'd probably never seen a white man sporting a keffiyeh.

    Then again, you are very tall. I wouldn't generally throw racist abuse at you.

  20. Sorry but I beg to differ with you anon and Bud Col Dr has won lots of arguments and to often proven to be right. Also God did save him that is the problem.

  21. Winning an argument is not outshouting the other. I long ago tired of Col. Dr. rants and rarely read past the first line anymore. I don't agree with Bud all the time but at least he doesn't go off the deep end and back up his arguments with childish name calling.

  22. You can't read past the first line because you're an undereducated American asshead who's too busy molesting his sister and her dog to pay attention to the collapse of society.

    And you're a coward, you're afraid to face the truth and realise that your American "version" of salvation is basically a blank cheque to murder the innocent people of the world in the "name" of somebody named "Jesus" who has no bearing or resemblance to the Biblical or historical Christ.

    You've been had, pal, whatever your name might be. It doesnt' matter, really, and in fact, you maintaining anonymity proves all the more how right I am, for your very identity has been taken away by your fear of the Establishment coming and taking your pretend freedoms away if you point out that you're all getting screwed.

    Coward. I rebuke you in the name of the living Christ.

  23. Just auditing the overall consensus of the pro-racist commentators, who for universality we'll refer to as Those Fucking Nazis.

    Apparently, to discourage and defeat racism, we are to be first encouraged that it exists, and is expressed automatically at such a thin instigation as Daniel Hoffmann-Gill trying to keep his neck warm, that we should find comfort in Daniel Hoffmann-Gill becoming a victim of automatic, institutionalised racism, that we should make jokes about racism (because apparently making fun of other people's suffering is the best way to cure it), that different groups in violent combat zones which distinguish themselves by using different modes of dress are "nutty," and that in order to maintain the appearance that we care about racism, we should feel guilty.

    Let me point out that these points are what we highly-trained, professional people refer to as psychological cultural residue.

    For instance, from the fucktard who bears no reason for mention, the orgasmic giddiness with which he is comforted by Daniel's experience with institutional racism is classically American, an inbred reaction handed down in their history of keeping black people under foot despite the fact that they're white trash who couldn't come up with a distinct culture outside of stealing it from others.

    Likewise with the encouragement that there is conflict--only Americans feel completely ill-at-ease when they're not attacking somebody (and losing, we point out).

    The self-loathing acceptance of racism, as put forth by another member on this page is indicative of subjugation by the Roman Catholic Church, most prevalent in the modern day in the Phillipines and Kenya. Self-loathing, the hallmark of those bonded to the Catholic church drips from the rest of the person's comments, swears fealty to fascist America in spirit and ideal, and betrays a sexual identity which is constantly in flux, as the commentator struggles to sort out just who he hates, and how much.

    Cowardly anonymous jabs which have yet to offer a single point of debatable information are just typical of round-shouldered, impotent desk jockeys for whom confrontation is the worst possibility, but whose immature sense of childish rage at being proven so wrong inflames them to attack. This is Corporate America at its purest, and essentially explains why women and children are daily firebombed while cowards mince around their offices dreaming of middle class retirements and what they'll eat next.

    The fat, the lazy, the afraid. This is all the defenders of racism have to offer? We, the free and strong people of the world laugh in the face of such weakness, and although momentarily it is these cheeseheads who possess the laser-guided bombs and transnational capital, we confidently look forward to the day in the near future when their artificial world spews them from the pages of history, and defecates them onto the shitheap of yesterday's news.

    God Save The Queen.

  24. I thought mental health care was free in Canada.

  25. "We, the free and strong people of the world laugh in the face of such weakness, and although momentarily it is these cheeseheads who possess the laser-guided bombs and transnational capital, we confidently look forward to the day in the near future when their artificial world spews them from the pages of history, and defecates them onto the shitheap of yesterday's news."

    *laughing* It is a deep and abiding wish of all *cheeseheads* that Canada please start to pick up the pace in taking care of its own defense. It's damn expensive to develop and produce laser guided missles. The best defense I have seen from Canada hails from Quebec. Viva la France!

  26. *cough*

    Can I have people's attention, I'm not going to get involved in this comment war but all I would ask is if Col.Dr you could please stop swearing so much as Bud.

    The name calling looks bad as does anon people leaving rubbish comments, get an id or get deleted.


  27. If Col.Dr's comment regarding 'self-loathing acceptance' of racism was directed at me, and I do believe it was, scanning everything else on this page I can't see anything else on here that would suggest otherwise:

    a) It's incredibly racist to suggest any sort of subjugation by the Catholic church. I was born in Canada. I'm half Filippino but that parent is not Catholic, nor is she religious. My father hates religion in general. To suggest anything like this based on what my picture looks like, well, I call RACIST on you. See what an easy trap that is to fall into?

    b) Saying that I 'swear fealty' to fascist America doesn't make it true because of the use of words you read in Naomi Klein's book. (See how easy it is to begin to generalize?) (off the record, I LOVE Naomi Klein, but did you know she bought 700 dollars worth of Patagonia gear with Avi Lewis last summer at my buddy's store?)

    c) How do you contribute to a discussion other than in the propagation of ideas that make other activists turn away? What would you do in DHG's position, Col.Dr?

    d) You gotta live in the world before you can begin to change a thing about it.

    e) 'Sexual identity constantly in flux?' Oh, you bet your ass it is! ;)

    ps. Col.Dr, you write like Ann Coulter, did you know that?

  28. I love codes. Especially when I know what they mean. Maybe I've been living under a rock, but I just learned there's a mess of underlying racist codes associated with the color of one's laces on one's boots. Or where it used to be colors that were gang problems, our school has a "no white t-shirt" policy.

  29. Broderick, I was pointing out that you throwing around the R word like a Chinese wingman is incredibly racist, and unlike every other white coward in the world, I don't run and hide whenever someone throws it at me.

    If you could put away your ambiguous self-loathing for a moment, and just see the damage that fucking pope did to you, you might be able to deconstruct the original arguments to see that it is exactly the prevalence of activist groups, outside the limits of reasonable logic in both rhetoric and how to approach discrimination that I attack through incredibly brilliant sarcasm, overt satire, and relentless pointing out of pretty basic realties that proponents of these activist ideologies are blind to.

    It is the very fact that no non-white person can dialogue with a white person without using racist four or five times that gives white racists so much power.

    Consider yourself, and honestly, how many Indonesian/Korean/Japanese stereotypes have you been exposed to? How many actually offend you, and how many times have you let one go by because it didn't rile you enough to bear mention?

    Does this make you a racist, by the way? Is your inability to rush out and be the Joan of Arc of the Filipino community what's going to send you to hell, or are you on some fucking asshole's hook?

    This is what I mean about being free. Why do I have to feel bad when I'm called a kike? Fuck you, asshole. Why do I have to feel bad when I'm called a Kraut? Fuck you very much. It is not humour which defeats racism, it is in fact a grip on one's own identity which secures one against either being the source of, or the recipient of racially uncool words and deeds.

    If we could stop scoring points off counting just who's fucking us over, and constantly splitting hairs over who's a racist and who's just some schmuck trying to get through life, a lot of reason would automatically help stabilise our social interactions, and inevitably lead to a peaceful, prosperous coexistence.

    However, those whose incomes rely on discord, namely corporate retail giants, politicians and those goddamned religious people cannot have peace, or else they're the ones who go broke. So they constantly rake poor weak minds over the coals of nonexistent racism to the point where it doesn't mean anything--and then when a racist act is committed everyone's too sick of hearing about racism to do anything about it.

    So no, I'm not a racist, but if you're a fucking asshole, count on me to be the first to make it clear to you. Feel free to object, but honestly, on this one you kinda jumped in front of a train on a latent point which has been carried over for a while.

    If you have been tracking the unintelligent oafs who make statements like, "I suppose it should be encouraging that you were called racist names, even though you are obviously caucasian," you'll be left wondering how in the hell that person could have an understanding of what racism is, and what threat it poses, if any, if it is in fact present in any given situation.

    My point is simple: Daniel bought a fucking scarf and was made to pay hell for it. Why? Because it caused so many who looked at him to ignore the obvious human inside, and switch immediately to preformed anti-Arab propaganda.

    That is hatred, my friend, and what is worse, it is a modern example of the instant dehumanisation my Jewish family is constantly haunted by whenever the very thought of how far some assholes take their intolerance comes around.

    That certain people do not immediately notice something is wrong when another is automatically discriminated against, let alone makes such an irresponsible statement to the effect that we should actually celebrate institutionalised hatred, is almost enough grounds to justify any outpouring of derision I've spilled on Daniel's blog.

    It comes down to the very simple fact. Hatred is not cool, but hating hatred is sometimes the only way to battle it.

    And, as for what's "incredibly racist," you should know that it is incredibly racist to think you can just call a white guy racist whenever your arguments run out of steam. Doing that makes you the KKK, pal, and inadvertently gives that bunch of yahoos more advertising power than a hundred burning crosses.

  30. And Ann Coulter has nothing on me. My ass is nicer, too.

  31. Ah, touche.

    True, true, true. Whose hook am I on? Hmm.......

    In any case, humour vs racism? Still a good point - If you use 'incredibly brilliant sarcasm, overt satire' etc etc, is that any different? Lenny Bruce did it too, but he was funny.

    Man, you're a tough one to figure out, but I'll cede to you on this one.

  32. !?%col.dr.?x-scan=no%?!

    To: DHG
    From: Bud
    Re: Col.Dr. 3.0 field tests


    I am pleased to report the field testing of Col.Dr. 3.0 is proceeding well. Detailed probing still reveals he is not quite capable of passing an extended Turing test, but progress has been made.


    As you know, the Col.Dr. project has been an attempt to develop cutting edge artificial intelligence systems. Cutting edge was an interesting phrase in the original project outline. We certainly gave him a "cutting" kind of personality. But as was discussed during development, the "blog troll" persona has been effective at getting people to interact with our various versions of the Col.Dr. and so improve the system.

    Current Status

    a) output fill in strategy
    I think we need to revisit the conversational "fill-in". You even found it annoying this time. One of the goals of the col.dr. project is that eventually we will give the system a fully robotic body. With speech synthesis, he will need to be able to interact with humans in real time. So in developing and testing the AI component, it was required that he be able to complete a response and not wait for longer than a few seconds, a normal conversational pause. Recall 1.0, where he would run out of material and just repeat the last thing over and over, like a sound card when a conventional computer has crashed. The "swearing" fill-in was originally just a lark, I remember the team had fun making up colourful expletives, but with schedule pressures they never took it out and the last couple of releases still have the swearing fill-ins.

    You can see it in this blog thread. The system choked on some comments and couldn't really come up with a good response, so it just filled in with more swearing. Someone suggested a "dual core"
    solution, with a separate processor dedicated to making up expletives, so when the main one delays, the secondary one fills in. It would fill in more creatively than the same shopworn expletives we put in it so long ago. But there may be other options. Simply pausing, to allow the AI component to complete its analysis and provide a response, might make future col.dr. versions look more intelligent. On the other hand, the "number of arguments won" count would drop. Unfortunately, many of his "wins" are by default when people tire of the abuse and just stop engaging him. So we must not consider it a backward step if later versions lose more completed arguments. I think we could still keep a copy of the current 3.0 version for use in other areas, such as automated bill collectors.

    b) response generation
    Here the col.dr. system is showing improvement. The primary response driver is to locate key words and phrases in someone's comment, and generate raw draft responses based on those. Correlation with earlier comments and the original post helps to weed out too many tangents, though this needs work. Refinement based on current events proceeds from there. So in the current blog thread, we have "racist", "Arafat", "colours of shoelaces", and a cultural reference to a decades old movie.

    The system correctly parsed much of the comment and generated a series of responses. I was most impressed that it related "watermelon man" with "black like me", it is showing advanced theme detection and recognition. It even provided another cultural reference to a modern day television show, and better yet, admonished me not to use it! It was a bit of a non-sequitur to talk about Hamas, simply because I mentioned Arafat and you mention PLO for the black and white Keffiyeh, but the current events rules would allow it, since double mention of political words would trigger a "related parties" check.

    The "colours of shoelaces" response was interesting. The system came up with "sociological badging" and "sectarian identification" from that, and correctly constructed an analogy to the Keffiyeh colours. I was a little surprised that he interpreted my "I didn't know about the different colours of Keffiyeh having meaning" as indicating total ignorance of "sociological badging". Not sure who put that phrase in, we always just called it "badging". After all, the "colours of shoelaces" line referred to different meanings of shoe laces, which should have caused the system to determine that the commenter does understand badging, and is simply referring to the fact that some forms of badging are not obvious to anyone outside the group.

    But he was designed to provoke, so taking any instance of "I don't know" and then attaching it to nearby elementary concepts alluded to (like badging) is certainly fulfilling the rhetoric generation goals of the system, which tends to keep conversations going (just look at the comment count in this sequence). I think the word "nutty" likely triggered a lot of the "isolated from humanity" type stuff, and "nuttiness" is repeated throughout the remaining responses. Good old "know thyself" stuff, and "must have never been in the military" constructions round out that post.

    c) satire, sarcasm, irony
    Here was an area that the col.dr. 3.0 system did not handle well on all instances. On the generation side, it did well. Look at this one: "Apparently, to discourage and defeat racism, we are to be first encouraged that it exists, and is expressed automatically at such a thin instigation as Daniel Hoffmann-Gill trying to keep his neck warm, that we should find comfort in Daniel Hoffmann-Gill becoming a victim of automatic, institutionalised racism, that we should make jokes about racism (because apparently making fun of other people's suffering is the best way to cure it), that different groups in violent combat zones which distinguish themselves by using different modes of dress are 'nutty,' and that in order to maintain the appearance that we care about racism, we should feel guilty."

    We don't assume he actually believes this, because it is prefaced wth "Apparently". For good measure "nutty" is repeated out of context, this time in describing combat uniforms as "badging" of the same nature as shoelace colours. Normally, we would disapprove of the run on sentence, but here the system has run it all together to emphasize that it is speaking sarcastically, or ironically. It does not actually believe that view, but is expressing it as a summation of what it claims is someone else's view. I think it adds a lot to the realism of this version.

    The irony detection needs some explanation. My first line said "I suppose it should be encouraging that you were called racist names, even though you are obviously caucasian." The col.dr. system should have seen "I suppose" as the start of a possibly ironic statement, similar to the use of "Apparently". He has seen "bud" use this preface before, and should have recognized it. However, when I first engaged the col.dr. in an earlier thread, he became confused with another commenter that I had been in disagreement with. In replying to that poster, I also mentioned that the col.dr. was simply insulting that person, so the confusion started there, and continues to this day. The "patriotic rhetoric" comment was a direct response to the views of the other poster, I don't think I provided any material to provoke that playback.

    My only problem with the "encouraging" statement is that both you and Broderick did not see it as ironic, simply saying you do not feel encouraged. As members of homo sapiens 1.0 (as we used to joke), you did not launch into a typical col.dr. tirade, but saw it as not really jiving with the rest of the comment. It would be interesting to see if you would have seen it for what I intended, if there had not been the several col.dr. comments that immediately followed. It's impressive when our own little AI system can get us to react as if it is real.

    You could say that I was racially stereotyping you though, your description of the situation was vivid. I could see in my mind the blocking for it as a scene in a play, and for some reason it just seemed like something out of english culture, specifically monty python. And it reminded me of the guy who turned black being arrested.

    What did I see that the current col.dr. version missed? Absurdity. Racism is so totally absurd, isn't it? "Yeah, these guys are this colour, those guys are that colour, let's kill those guys." I just re-checked the top of this, I have put the col.dr. "no scan" tag on it, hopefully it still works in col.dr. 3.0, otherwise my last sentence will be lifted and parroted ad nauseum as being my point of view. The quotation marks will probably be not enough if he ignores the noscan tag. He seems incapable of seeing this absurdity, and does not see how demonstrating it could be used to defuse the ignorance of punks before it becomes hatred. The punks were ignorant because they didn't know you have the wrong colour of skin for the clothing you were wearing.

    I did find it encouraging that the punks were simply ignorant, and not being trained in school how to spot the inferior races, as the nazis did. They don't have a lot of institutionalized hate to unlearn, they simply need to learn they are being uncool, and their behaviour is absurd. I found it encouraging that Daniel was not detained, confined, anally probed, and sent to a death camp.

    d) line crossing
    I was most disappointed in his later comment, just before declaring "I win". As we know, the Col. Dr. is argumentative, but attempts to score a debating point with this: "And I'm also noting the fact that a Brazillian got shot for running to catch his train last year, which makes being so mistaken potentially dangerous". We finally see some of the source of the previous mess. I find it disturbing that he would use this.

    The person he calls "a Brazilian" was a man. His name was Jean Charles de Menezes. He was initially identified as caucasian by police when they saw him leaving his home to go to work. He lived in an apartment block where the police believed another man lived, a suspect in attempted bombings the previous day. Through a series of terrible mistakes this man ended up being killed, possibly by special forces. The police completely screwed up. The man was not misidentified by racism, he was misidentified because he lived where a suspect lived and had a passing resemblence to the suspect.

    For the Col. Dr. to use this to score petty debating points is disgusting. The death of Mr. Menezes is an example of panicky overreacting.

    And we see plenty of overreacting from the Col. Dr.

    And overreacting is not potentially dangerous. It is dangerous.

  33. I love Col.Dr a lot, I love Broderick a bit and I'm really fond of Bud.

    Let's all just get along now and have a cuddle while I get attacked for being a Paki...

  34. Officially Designated Fucktard, just so you know, we Mensans are always amused when a <2%er works their lobes up into a froth in an attempt to exchange verbal diarrhea with intelligent observation and clear thought.

    I'm flattered that I've become the obsession which keeps you awake at night, as you strain to maintain your psychic cohesion in the face of your latest boner comments.

    Sociological badging is the term used to describe sectarian identification in a variety of social constructs. When present in a social group which is beyond being a "gang," but is not quite a formal "army," but is neither a proper "guerilla," group there are certain factors which become unique to it, which is why the study of the Palestinian independence movement is worthy of its own field of study.

    Of course, if you are not familiar with these terms, and don't find them on google, it's because they are industry standard terms, and probably aren't available to those who sit on their blogs growing cheese in their ass.

    However, they are common to we highly-trained professionals, for whom the task of trying to predict what kind of asshead verbal diarrhea the less-than-brilliant non-Mensan population is going to throw at us when we peg them for making stupid comments.

    I find it interesting that you attempt to clarify your boner line in this appeal, which we in the industry call an attempt to split loyalties.

    You'll notice that, while I address Daniel in my posts, my comments are directed toward the specifics of your boner comments, and is not intended to test loyalties of anyone to anyone else. I address Daniel out of respect, and out of further respect restrict my comments to the person or issue directly at hand.

    This is the parliamentary way, the superior, Commonwealth way, which is unknown in America. It allows for tolerance, especially when fucktards make boner comments.

    It is easy to discern from your last, desperate comment that you feel somehow threatened, for some reason known only to you, and one could just assume that you're too ignorant to just admit that saying Daniel should be encouraged that people discriminated against him--when Sunday 2 men were attacked and killed by a gang simply for looking Arabic--was wrong.

    Had you intended to say it was better he be called a Paki than swarmed by 15 men and stabbed to death, or shot by a Bobby on the tram, then I suggest you should have simply said that, rather than feel threatened by the enormity of my cock and vastly superior intellect.

    As was asked on another post to another unenlightened fucktard, let me ask you, what makes you simply assume that anyone who disagrees with you is wrong? Rather than contribute counter points or, in the case of celebrating the outbreak of Danielphobia by jumping around the room, screaming to your Nazi god how encouraged you were that people still hate each other blindly, simply clarifying that what you said came out sounding fucktard-ish, you launched into a personal, wounded, and immediate attack on me personally.

    Now, I deal with uninformed fucktards about a million times per day. This is part of being a highly-trained professional, and my majestically famous ability to maintain clear thought and intelligent decision-making through these vitriolic fucktard attacks keeps me in my present position.

    Yes, I do not think so highly of myself as to not know that, could someone do better I would be replaced, and neither do I value my own interests so much that, in lieu of what's best for the Cause I would refuse to stand down if ordered.

    However, my superiors have such supreme confidence in my abilities that I have a great sense of security, and the benefits of their trust in me are apparent every day in the widespread success of the Cause in every corner of every society, all around the world.

    Therefore, and on the basis of your inability to yet contribute a single point worth pondering, you remain Official Fucktard #7892. Yes, this means that there are almost eight thousand of you which you would have to out-boner to become #1 in anyone's books.

    Have a nice day, and don't forget, your taxes pay my salary.


  35. Daniel Hoffman-Gill, your patience is amazing. While you are being beaten into a mound of blood, flesh, sinew, and bone for being a PAKI, please take solice in the following:

    Every known problem(racism, AIDS, the Bush Administration to name a few)faced by people today, has been traced back to one moment in history. This moment is when the unknown idiot, standing on the shores of the North American Continent, when asked by the first Canadian explorers if they could settle here, said: "Sure."

    At last count there are some 100,000 Wyoming Christians closing in on the good "col.dr." to have a "talk".

  36. Dear, dear 51, all you and your yokel friends need to do is merely ask for my 411. I'd honestly hate to deprive you and your "Christian" compatriots the chance to martyr someone who stands up against the evil of racism.

    In fact, of the people who called Daniel by that tragic racist name, I'd be confident that almost none of them are followers of Islam, Ahimsa, Ba'hai, or any of the "heretic" religions that Christians persecute in their murderous rampage of "loving" God's creation into extinction.

    So, if you and your piddly hunnert-kay hillbillies really want a piece of me, just say the word and I'll arrange for a nice, unpleasant confrontation somewhere in Minnesota, or if you think it's more "loving" to try and kill someone while invading their own country (which apparently you all do), we can arrange to rumble in Manitoba, but on condition that any of you is able to find it on a map.

    No, I'm not trying to hide behind your ignorance, but it is true that only 17% of Americans can find their own state on a map, so here's the clue. Manitoba is the big piece of land due north of Duluth.

    So load up your rusty RVs, and pack them cattle wagons, and all y'all good ole boys come on up for a bit of schooling as to why asshead Americans, especially "Christian" Americans, should shut their bloodthirsty mouths and mind their own business down in their own little polluted country down there.

    Of course, you'll be like every other illegal American alien, who sneaks across our border looking for work, but wants to stay for the freedom, the democracy, the FREE UNIVERSAL HEALTHCARE (even to illegal aliens), and the general niceness and non-lethal, nonreligious ways of believing we enjoy.

    Mind you, 51, now that a Conservative is temporarily running things, and since he's Dubya's lickspittle and mimicks everything he does, they want to close the border, and deport all you illegal American aliens back across the river.

    Can't say I agree with it, since I'm not an American Christian, and therefore don't want to kill everything that rears its head, but you people tampered with my government so now it's out of my democratic control.

    Up to me, I'd say let the wetback gringos stay, but you know, an asshead is running things so it's goodbye to my John, goodbye Rosalynn, adios my friends, James and Maria.

    You won't have a name when you ride the big airplane. All they will call you will be...deportee.

    Seriously, nobody yet has inferred physical violence except you, so why don't you just come out and tell us your war stories about hiding in your ROE when the mortar was falling in Panama? I'm sure everyone will get a real big kick out of hearing a coward's tale.

  37. So ... I take it this isn't a good time to ask you to donate to the SEVEN HUNDRED CLUB.

  38. 51, brilliant! *laughing* *laughing* *laughing* The contrast is hysterical.

  39. Well, 51, while you snicker from your retirement Barcolounger over all the people you and your "loving" religion have murdered, consider this:

    If the Apostles Paul had been like you, he would have continued relishing his participation in the murders of the original Christians.

    Stephen would have died in vain, because, your version of the Pauline model has him struck blind on the Road to Damascus, but remaining an asshead murderer.

    Thus, it is easy to see where the American cult has lost its way, as they are more like the "you" Paul, greedy, blind assholes who go around killing people for fun.

    As your type has always stood proud as the modern Pharisees, then, I would suggest that you, and every other racist psuedo-Christian who thinks like you doesn't really count, and when you say the word, "Christian," you are in fact saying, "asshead American sans mens influentia."

    In other words, while you might get your latter-day thrills defending racism, and let's remember this whole flame war started over Daniel's experience with automatic racism and your kind's defense of that evil, and uttering veiled threats from a distance you believe to be safe and secure from the prying eyes of the various security and law enforcement agencies who get concerned when assheads threaten violence over the Net, the fact remains that you're really not a "Christian" at all, either in spirit or intent.

    Thus having discredited yourself, and further embarrassed those very few Christian people who live the words of Christ in loving their neighbour without bombing them into submission, I would suggest you simply shut up, as you imperil yourself, Christians, and Americans in general to general disregard.

    I would rebuke you in Christ's name, but it is clear you have not heard it's call. You rush about in the mantle of a sheep, but cannot see your wolfish hatred of Creation is no longer hidden.


  40. I wish to clarify one thing. If I led the good "Col.Dr." astray, I sincerely apologize. I do not, nor have I ever, meant to physically harm the good "Col.Dr.". I am neutral, that is to say, a reporter of facts,a messenger, a conduit of information. Also,I am a person of knowledge and others tell me a man of wisdom. Why would I even think of doing physical harm to the good "Col.Dr." when there are 100,000 plus others, hell bent to kick his ass, already on the way?

  41. You are boring, sir, and laughably deluded. Were that I had the ability to cause one hundred thousand Americans to do anything but eat themselves to death in front of the television.

    The only ambitious people in America are themselves victims of racism, and are apparently about to be deported en masse.

  42. OK ... Then I take your answer as "No". You are not interested in a year's subscription to "Conservative Digest" with the free lapel pin.

  43. You're already recycling your comedic vehicles, asshead. I refer back to my "boring" observation.

    Gee, maybe you should try a few captions or some song lyrics, you little emo wanker.

    Have a nice day and another pizza.


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