Thursday, 19 November 2009

Internet Laws Part 3: DeMyer's Laws

Ken DeMyer is a terrible online hack and his uniquely awful writing style has influenced a whole raft of laws in his name, which are best observed by anyone who doesn't want to come across as a bit of a crank and Internet loon. DeMyer's Laws are as follows...

DeMyer's Zeroth Law of Internet Debating states:

“If you are Ken DeMyer...or another of Kenneth DeMyer's aliases, the debate will eventually reach a state where you violate one of the internet laws and you are going to lose.”

DeMyer's First Law of Internet Debating states:

“Anyone who brings Young Earth Creationism into an argument - that is not about creation, the origins of life or the age of Earth - requires no further serious consideration and is deemed to have lost the argument.”

DeMyer's Second Law of Internet Debating states:

“Anyone who posts an argument on the internet which is largely quotations, can be very safely ignored and is deemed to have lost the argument before it has begun.” (On a personal level I have extensive experience of dealing with bloggers that use this terrible tactic, which runs hand in hand with the Argument From Authority fallacy)

DeMyer's Third Law of Internet Debating states:

“Anyone who posts a picture with a caption which does anything other than describe the picture is deemed to have already lost on the point they were trying to make and it can be ignored."


  1. But Lock's third law of Internet communication states: "Anyone deliberately engaging on a mass debate via internet forum, chatroom or email round-robin should automatically be classed as mass debaters".

    Honestly, all this pent-up aggression and point scoring and putting the worlds to rights via political blogs of various persuasions is really the ultimate virtual circle jerk, innit?

    Talk about impotent fury. In the old days, it would be hoary old fuckers in the pub nursing a pint for an hour, spouting claptrap. Now it's all gone online. The old days were better. At least you came out of it with that well-meaning glow of alcoholism.

    I'm off to have a wank now. There's a great Russian rape porn site I've found. Now that's what the Internet is really about, no?

  2. Darren, even if sometimes I really don't agree with you, I like your beans.


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